I have an appointment this Thursday for a check up but for the past week I’ve had severe anxiety over it. It’s literally a review to see how I am doing but the thought of going always makes me sick to my stomach (this will be my third visit as an out-patient, my other 2 times I was terrified then too, I also had a third visit which was my CT scan but even then I was in and out in five minutes but I was still scared as hell).
Hospitals scare me, they are depressing and scary. I was there for 10 days and it is something I am absolutely terrified of repeating, so going for a check-up just reminds me of the long stay I had there. It’s absolute fear. My anxiety is destroying my body. It’s awful. If I stay in good health I’ll probably need to be reviewed every 6months to a year, I don’t think I can go through this much anxiety every year.
Does anyone have any tips, like should I tell my specialist when I see him? Like ‘yo doc, these hospital trips scare the beejesus out of me, help maybe?’ It’s not only that but we’re a good 40 minutes from the hospital and because it’s the NHS it’s always running way behind so I sit in the waiting room for what will be an hour gnawing at my nails until there’s nothing left.
Anxiety is a bitch.